Anyone who writes this sort of post will always pick the cutesy habits, the ones that make people think “awww, that’s not that bad, she must be an awesome human being if that’s the worst she has!”. Let’s get this down right now – I am not an awesome human being.
- I am SO BAD AT HOUSEHOLD STUFF. I clean the bathroom quite regularly, because it’s quite a therapeutic job, but poor Edd gets lumbered with the kitchen. And the bins. I can’t even play the “weak and feeble” card – I just hate kitchen cleaning. As does poor Edd, he’s just too nice to make me do it. So I play the bathroom card, and get away with it. I’m a monster.
- I’m a duvet hog. That’s not terrible in itself, but I seem to growl in my sleep at Edd if he ever tries to take the duvet away. Not in a “oooh sexy” growl, an actual feisty terrier that isn’t playing when you’re trying to take the duvet away.
- I’m terrible with money. Most people are, but I’m like, really bad. There’s a reason people like me aren’t usually given credit cards. Every now and again I’ll panic, tighten my budget and do really well for a while. Then because I’ve done really well, I think I deserve a treat. If you think about it, Alice, you don’t deserve a treat for being a well-adjusted adult.