Today has not been a great day. In fact, the last week hasn’t.
I’ve been short-tempered, irritable, stressed out at work, and worst of all, paranoid.
I’m on my way off Citalopram, and have been for the last fortnight. The first few days were OK, I was tired but nothing to really worry about. Then I got a migraine, which could be down to:
a) working in an office, staring at a screen all day and needing new glasses
b) coming off Citalopram
c) a combination of the two.
So when I got back to work, I’d missed two days and had a lot to catch up on, and not enough time. I felt like the cartoon character on a treadmill where your legs just can’t go fast enough no matter how hard you try.
And I lost my shit. That’s a technical term, by the way. But I really lost my rag. And the tiniest of things have been making me mad. Not just mad, but so frustrated. I don’t get angry – I’m not an angry person. I’m more of a, get really frustrated and cry and make a fool out of yourself, kind of person.
I haven’t been sleeping that well either, which is probably another result of the comedown, but certainly isn’t helping things.
Anyway, the blog is to help me rant, and to get things off my chest, so this is probably the best place to take out my anger and frustration, and paranoia (WHY DOESN’T ANYONE LIKE ME ANYMORE?!) (n.b.they do, i’m just paranoid AF).
On the plus side, losing weight has been a bit easier (given I put all of it on while on the meds), but I just don’t have the energy. And I want to stuff literally all the carbohydrates in my face.
Swings and roundabouts.
The big problem is it has led to me making a few mistakes at work – silly mistakes, admin errors that don’t cost anything, they just cost time. I don’t know whether to let my bosses know that I’m currently in this process, or whether to just give myself a slap and try and be a bit more alert.
Anyone been through a similar thing? I’d preferably like stories with a happy ending…